Wednesday, December 31, 2014
Tuesday, December 30, 2014
Monday, December 29, 2014
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Saturday, December 27, 2014
Justine's Journal #19
52 Weeks 500 Words
This is how it began: Justine (not her real
name) decided to write 500 words (or as near as), anything goes, per week for 52
weeks. She would then submit it for anonymous posting, via me, her friend.
Perhaps a pattern will emerge from her words, but at this stage it’s more an
experiment I have agreed to share in. I’ll attempt to draw conclusions at the
end of this. Stay tuned if this resonates with you.
Week 19
'And here we are in the days after Christmas. We still have
New Year to deal with, but the big day is now behind us. For my part I discovered
that my change in attitude actually helped me accept the day for what it can
be. In fact, I strove to make it come about, simply by smiling more.
Imagine then my absolute surprise when my brother (I haven’t
seen him in eight years and last spoke to him around five years back) phoned me
out of the blue and told me he’d be nearby and would I like to spend the day
with him? I said yes, and we had a really wonderful time!
Did my change in attitude bring this gift to me? This is
what I now sit and ponder. Do we open ourselves to good things when we begin to
regard situations and times with a more open eye and mind attitude? I believe
so.
Always I've said if you think positive you’ll become
positive, but this is the first direct proof of what a change in thinking, a
change in how I look at things, can make happen. Proof positive indeed! Having decided
to let go of my negativity surrounding Christmas, I was open to receiving. It’s
not about reward, know that, but it is about a natural flow of energy. And I spent
the day with my brother! How absolutely wonderful.
Next is New Year. This has always been a time of ambivalence
for me. On the one hand it means the season of goodwill must end (although, for
me, that ‘goodwill’ thing has been missing for years) and on the other it means
the old year can now be left behind and a new start made. If the old year was
filled with trials, then I look forward to starting again. If it was good
before, I wonder if it means the new year holds all the trials I managed to
escape in the one past. Are we not the strangest creatures? Always with the
complications.
I’m aware, if you actually seek new and old, we should look
to the seasons for renewals and endings, not at a calendar invented by man to
mark days. New Year’s Day isn’t actually new anything, looking at it from Earth’s
point of view- for us here in the south, the season of renewal begins in
September. All of this is relative now, and isn't the point I’m trying to make.
As a society, generally speaking, New Year is New Start, and most of us in fact
tend to take stock then.
Do I make those resolutions meant for New Year? I don’t. I feel
we cannot allow a list to determine our way of thinking and being. Real resolution
comes from within. Have I made resolutions for 2015? I have, and it is about the
natural flow of energy. Between me and you, in relationships, in life, that
sort of thing. Positivity.
Some may call that LOVE. I’m holding thumbs for the good
stuff.
Happy New Year!'
Tuesday, December 23, 2014
Monday, December 22, 2014
Saturday, December 20, 2014
Justine's Journal #18
52 Weeks 500 Words
This is how it began: Justine (not her real
name) decided to write 500 words (or as near as), anything goes, per week for 52
weeks. She would then submit it for anonymous posting, via me, her friend.
Perhaps a pattern will emerge from her words, but at this stage it’s more an
experiment I have agreed to share in. I’ll attempt to draw conclusions at the
end of this. Stay tuned if this resonates with you.
Week 18
'Here in the southern hemisphere summer has arrived. Already
everything is drying out from ever-present wind and, of course, the heat. Every
day we hope for a little rain to ease the dryness, to help our gardens grow …
to feel renewed.
I remember, as a child, how summer thrilled me. Time for the
sprinklers to go on, time for swimming, for cold juice and ice-cream. Screaming
on the beach, playing in the waves, building sandcastles. As a teenager it was
about the tan, the bikini, and boys, of course.
Now, older, wiser, I wonder at our stupidity. Had we stayed
out of the sun more, we’d have less freckles now, less skin damage. Still,
looking back, those days were bliss, and skin damage isn’t so bad given the
days of glory we experienced.
It’s holiday season and the beaches are now crowded with sun
worshippers. Today I shake my head and think to myself it’s all rather
pointless. It’s not the sun and sea, for I understand the pleasure kids receive
from a day out, it’s the crowds. Everyone does the same thing, flocking to the
nearest stretch of beach sand to spend the day with hordes of others. It’s
pointless, because how do you know yourself amongst so many? How do you grow
your personality when, for the most part, you find yourself competing with
others doing exactly what you’re about?
I hear you say ‘but you did the same’ once upon a time,
don’t therefore judge. The truth is I never went where the crowds were. It
seems to me whenever we went to the beach as kids, it was a lonely place and the
entire white expanse was ours for an entire magical day. For this I must thank
my parents; clearly they preferred the silence. Yes, as teenagers, there were
many of us congregating, but again, we chose quiet places. Perhaps it was my
luck to know friends who thought like me, choosing privacy over public
displays, and perhaps I chose in that manner because of the way I was raised.
I prefer privacy. When I go to the beach now, it is in the
evening when the light is spectacular, the temperature bearable, and the sand
is filled only with footprints. Of course, often I am not alone in this choice
and others are about the same actions at that time of day. We greet as we pass
each other by … and move on to enjoy the solitude.
I’m not yet in my elder years, in case you were wondering,
and many of those I do greet in passing aren’t either, it’s simply a choice
made that fits. It is a time to enjoy late evening sunshine, balmy air, and
witness the almighty display of a sunset.
Why am I writing about this, you ask, beyond proving my
preference for privacy? It’s the rain, see. When it does rain here in summer,
suddenly everyone abandons the outdoors. The beaches are empty, the malls full.
Public display moves elsewhere.
And then I wander the lonely stretch of sand in daylight
under glowering heavens with freshness all around, with rain drumming upon my
shoulders. It is still warm – it’s summer! – and the smell of water and dry
earth meeting is beyond every description. I am renewed, as the land is
renewed.
Do I like summer? In the evening when all is quiet, indeed,
and, absolutely yes, when it rains. Why? Because it isn't pointless, it is
renewal. It is knowing myself.'
Friday, December 19, 2014
Thursday, December 18, 2014
Wednesday, December 17, 2014
Tuesday, December 16, 2014
Monday, December 15, 2014
Saturday, December 13, 2014
Justine's Journal #17
52 Weeks 500 Words
This is how it began: Justine (not her real
name) decided to write 500 words (or as near as), anything goes, per week for 52
weeks. She would then submit it for anonymous posting, via me, her friend.
Perhaps a pattern will emerge from her words, but at this stage it’s more an
experiment I have agreed to share in. I’ll attempt to draw conclusions at the
end of this. Stay tuned if this resonates with you.
Week 17
'Life is definitely a rollercoaster! Up and down with wide
swings and narrow turns. I've gone back and had a look at previous entries and,
you know what? I come across as a bit of a whine. I seem to be a rather
negative person … at least, I sound like one when I’m writing my feelings down.
I don’t like that. Right, that’s another whine for you.
Still, I don’t like that about myself, for I've always believed I’m a rather
positive kind of person. Fine, understandably, that idiot who decided to stalk
me, that would make anyone negative and cause absolute distrust with
surroundings and people, and yet I should be able to move forward and be more positive.
That, after all, was a life experience, the kind that teaches lessons. The
learning is itself a positive attribute. And now I find myself smiling, for I do
believe the lesson just came home! And as I haven’t again heard a peep from the
quarter, I think I’ll take it on board.
There it is. The more positive outlook. I know life is hard
and each of us needs to deal with so many issues, circumstances, emotions and
situations, and I’m aware this is why we sometimes sound negative to others-
when a friend asks how you are, do you say ‘fine’ or do you actually tell your
friend the truth? You’d tell a real friend the truth, the bad stuff, how
terrible you feel etc, and that might make us appear whining. How enlightening.
Enlightening, because it now occurs to me that to be regarded as a positive
person by others, including our real friends, do not tell the truth.
That can’t be right. This is a concept that requires more
soul-searching, I think. I’ll do so and let you in on my conclusions when I
have them. At this point, however, allow me to say I’d rather be seen as a
whine than be less than truthful with those who matter, as I would prefer them
to tell me their ‘bad’ stuff no matter how that makes them appear.
Let us celebrate honesty first! The rest we can figure out
as we go. And that, friends, is actually a positive attitude. Hmm, I’m quite
proud of me right now.'
