Justine's Journal #38

52 Weeks 500 Words

This is how it began: Justine (not her real name) decided to write 500 words (or as near as), anything goes, per week for 52 weeks. She would then submit it for anonymous posting, via me, her friend. Perhaps a pattern will emerge from her words, but at this stage it’s more an experiment I have agreed to share in. I’ll attempt to draw conclusions at the end of this. Stay tuned if this resonates with you.

Week 38

"Remember the post about the premonition I had about my brother? Remember the dream about Lotto numbers? Today, as I sit to write this, I’m wondering about these events anew. I've been reading some new work Elaina sent me (and if you know her work, you know premonition, dreams and visions form a part of it) and something she wrote has put me to thinking. It was about the concept understanding, the feeling something rather than the knowing, although the two go together, of course.

Feeling something rather than knowing. Now isn't that just a humdinger. We tend to think we need to know something first before accepting the feelings that go with it. And when we do sense (feel) something, we think we must research the thing to know the thing before trusting what we sensed. Like me with my brother. I said I would investigate this premonition phenomenon and then post about it. Because, let’s face it, I didn't trust my ability to simply sense something was wrong. I have to know how it’s possible.

Well, let me just say here my investigations have led me to the point where I understand it’s feeling something rather than knowing, and to trust my inner voice, to allow for the likelihood instincts sometimes kick us into gear. This isn't an entry about premonition and I may now never do so, because there is no logical answer. It’s a feeling. It’s not a knowing. And, knowing it’s not a knowing, the knowing and the feeling go together, if you understand my meaning J

The reason I ponder the two events mentioned, besides having read the prompt in Elaina’s work, is due to another small event that happened to me this past week. A small thing, but my stomach sort of hollowed out and got me to thinking. (Maybe not so small a thing, then)

I was driving in the suburbs around me and took a turn I rarely use (on my way to a dentist) and as I started pulling at the steering wheel I saw in my mind’s eye a little hairy dog run across the road. Instinct made me slow down quite a bit and, as I turned the corner, there was a dog running across the road indeed. Had I not slowed, chances are I would have hit him/her. The dog wasn't hairy and it was bigger, but a dog was running across the road where I saw it would.

Right, so my stomach caved in; this was quite a thing. Déjà vu? Premonition? Instinct? Vision? The universe telling me to slow down when taking a corner? Heaven knows, but I tell you now categorically, from here on out I intend to listen to my feelings, however they end up being presented to me, whether sight, sound or a shiver over skin.

I learn something new daily. How absolutely magical."